Friday, February 21, 2014

Sav, Viv & six degrees of separation.

A little over a week ago, we were smack dab in the middle of madness.

Ribbons, bows, songs, dances, red carpets, clappers, give-aways...in short, wedding preparations for the latest big wedding in the family - Sav & Viv.

Detail upon detail was discussed, finalized and then often - discussed again and changed. Whats app chat groups, lengthy emails, visits to tailors, practices, way too many phone calls - you name it, we had it all going on.
It was completely insane. And yet, it was the best thing ever.



Sav and Viv, I figure in all the madness, you may have missed out on a few things. So I thought I'd fill you in on some of the stuff that happened at our end - the boys side. Some of the wonder that was your wedding and the lead-up to it. Stuff that we may have all been too busy to realize, but are thankful for.

Sav, your home and everyone in it. Everyone wanted to help. Whether it was tying bells to chopsticks, or feeding those of us who sat in Chinese factory fashion - everyone wanted to do something to make your special day perfect. That is good fortune.

Your mother. She practiced to dance with you. She felt shy and hesitant and emotional. But she made sure she looked her best and she made sure she took off her sweater, to dance with her golden boy. That is precious.

Your nieces. Oh my, your nieces. One practiced and practiced till your 'Primavera' was perfect. She was so concerned throughout and worried she would mess up. But on the day; in her purple gown and with her unsure  eyes - she was perfect. Sims, our little lady.
The other surprised us all. She perfected dance steps. Did you see? She was so nervous about running to the front to be picked up and thrown in the air! She became the baby girl that we all remember in that instance. She was the little Yva again.

Your cousins. They did everything they could on the wedding day to make it perfect. From opening church doors to the right chords of your entrance hymn, to running around the venue searching for the videographers, to having long, patient conversations with exasperating limo drivers. That is blood.

Your boys. Seeing you guys together made me realize what you mean to each other. At the park, it was like watching grown men leap out of their bodies and remember what it was like to be boys.  At your roce, watching a certain Mr. Sher sit with you and shiver his behind off - that is friendship.

Your bhai. My boy. He was your witness with all the pride that his heart can hold. He said he would stay with you all day - just in case. Of anything. He covered you with a blanket as you slept a few nights before. He said he would say what had to be said to anyone who needed it to be said to. You know. That, is brotherhood.

Your sister. Gosh. Where to start?
If she had to climb mountains and swim through rivers - she would have. She drove all over Dubai, nearly every day for two months, just to sort out every minute wedding detail.

You know her. Can you imagine the number of lists we were working with? She managed to stay on top of everything - travel plans, costing, family, friends, emotions...and then I saw her as you got married. As you danced. As you replied to the toast. When I watched you and her other boys dance with her...that is the only time I cried at your wedding. Because she deserved to know how special she is. To you boys and to the rest of us as well. That is love.

Your Jeej. He was ready for anything. To act, to dance, to party, to pick and drop - anything for Chinna. He folded tulle fabric (and yes, there was a lot of it!) he made sure the rest of us ate, he was the perfect big brother. He even color co-ordinated outfits with his wife. *grins* That's a lot more than just a Jeeju.

Your bridesmaid spent ages figuring out how and when she would sort out your saado make-up. She packed a bag for herself and you, made mental lists of all the stuff you may need - and put it together. She stayed with you that Friday evening. Just to know you were ok. That is caring.

Our little girl, Leah. The morning of your wedding we watched her take about 15 steps with so much confidence! We knew that she would be able to walk the aisle, at least a little. She did. In her own baby girl way - she was there.

Your friends. They got together with your family and went over dance steps, drafted skits, learnt entire routines in a day. They celebrated with us, helped without hesitation, watched you with happy hearts. That is loyalty. 

Ara and I are strong believers in the theory of 6 degrees of separation. That we are all linked to like minded people, by just 6 degrees. Which would mean, that others like us, people we would instantly get along with, identify with, feel a oneness with...were only a few steps away.

Through your wedding, it's amazing how many of us found each other. Some we already knew of, some we met and recognized immediately. On your wedding night - we were not parents, children, cousins, friends, photographers.
We were all just one big family. We watched you with love, happiness and pride.

It's like Ara said. The people around you on your special day...they are what matters. They will always be there, no matter what. For anything and everything. Present physically or in spirit - they are who they are.

That is family.

Congratulations you two. You have all our love, prayers and good wishes as you go forward to do life together. My advice for you?

Shucks, I have none. Go on, make your mistakes. Overcome your own hurdles, celebrate the little victories.
Learn together. And always remember to love.


Leaving you with this one. I know I'll never be able to hear it without thinking of you guys.
And yes,  it's a favorite of mine too now.

Big hugs.